Monday, 24 December 2012


This is a small gossip drama between two Igbos living in Lagos. They did not travel for the Xmas and are having a family gathering and general meeting. You want to know why they did not travel? The answer is not  too far. All you need do is read on;- ENJOY!

Emeka: Em,,, somebody please bring kola, Ose-Oji, and em wetin again sef? yes grinded ground nut and em, yes,,,,garden eggs. So, now that everything is complete, let us pray and bless our land and ancestors.

Chinedu: Emeka are you okay? Bless our land? This is not Igbo land na and we cannot be blessing our land here. This is Lagos. Em, we cannot do it here o!

Emeka: But why not? Do it here is a must biko! Did not em, "Nnabuife Social Club of Nigeria" did their end of year meeting at Anjorin  and they killed three cows for the celebration? Why will our own be different?

Chinedu: Tufia kwa! Our own will be different because we are not afraid like them. We will be travelling. Our end of year general meeting must be done at Nnewi!.

Emeka: (Laughs) God forbid! So that after the meeting I will be missing abi? Count me out! If we cannot do it here in Lagos, then count me out! A black goat must be brought home before the night falls. If not, we can no longer differentiate between the goat and the darkness. So please count me out. I am not travelling.

Chinedu: Count you out? but why?

Emeka: Ha! as if you don't know. The fear of kidnappers is now the beginning of wisdom for Ndigbos!

Chinedu: Ol boy na true o! No wonder all my neighbours no travel.

Emeka: Why dem go travel? Wh wants to be kidnapped? Mama Anwulika, Mama Ebuka and the rest of them... they are all here in lagos o, even their husbands and children too.

Chinedu: Okay!!! So is that why Nnabuife Social Club of Nigeria held their end of year meeting here in Lagos?

Emeka: Gbam! Now you get the message. All of them are afraid of kidnappers and prefer to just do their end of year meeting here. That was why they killed 3 cows at anjorin and celebrated there... Not only that my brother. Even peoples club have decided to meet in Lagos.

Chinedu: Chineke!!! Ewooooo! That cannot happen! E never reach like that. Abi E reach like this?

Emeka: Yes oh! E reach like this o...as kidnappers and armed robbers have taken over the whole east, ehen!, let us all stay here in lagos and safe our lives and properties. If the Governors over there cannot see this as a problem, then the solution is to stay put here and abandon the east for them and the kidnappers. Governor embezzle, kidnappers maim and steal peoples hard earned money and labour of a life time.

Chinedu: See, E no go better sef, make we change our names to Segun and Femi? at least, people will no longer look at us as igbos. At least nobody holds a grudge against the yorubas for not travelling na.

Emeka: Shut up, shut up, you talk too much. ha

Chinedu: Ehen! Which is better? E better to talk to much and be alive than talk small and be kidnapped in the East. Oya bring the Kola-nut forward abeg make we begin bless am. I agree with you. Na here we go doam. KIDNAPPERS, WE ARE NOT COMING HOME THIS YEAR! HAHAHAHAHA