WAgibiMKmYvSj4hDhtXxp_xbM5c =10KNews=: FOLUKE DARAMOLA: ROLE MODEL FOR RAPE VICTIMS WHO CAN'T TALK!

Saturday 19 January 2013

FOLUKE DARAMOLA: ROLE MODEL FOR RAPE VICTIMS WHO CAN'T TALK!


If you are quite familiar with Nigerian movies, then the name FOLUKE DARAMOLA should ring a bell or two. In a recent interview with the Punch, she bares it all, including her traumatic experience with rape. To Iyaniwura, that's a very bold and courageous step, talking about such a traumatic experience is a phase to get over it, and one that should be encouraged, as it improves the healing process. Here are excerpts of the interview, we hope you learn a thing or two, enjoy:


Competition From Upcoming Actors
The only thing that is constant in life is change. If you do not look beyond and think outside of the box, you are going to box yourself in the corner. What I mean by that is that there is no how you would not grow. There is this proverb that says you have to take a bow when the ovation is loudest. Taking a bow doesn’t mean leaving the scene; it means you should go and re-strategise and find ways to work around things that would make you relevant. There is no way I would say my younger colleagues should not grow. I started out when I was a teenager and I have had my fair share of the industry. I’m still having it. I’m still staying relevant. The only thing you can do is just to make yourself relevant. A threat from the younger generation is not one that relates with me. I am not one that would sit in a corner. A lot of my colleagues ask why I read so much. I just had my masters degree, I am going for my Ph.D. I believe in dynamism and upgrading myself at every point in time so nobody is a threat to me.

My First Crush
I would say that my first crush was my first relationship. I was about 17 years old then. Unfortunately, he was not the first person I had sex with. I share it with the younger generation because it is something that has been talked about but I have got over it. The first time I had sex, I was raped. I had my first relationship with the first person I had a crush on, Seun Olomofe. He is one of the most caring and considerate persons I have ever met in my life. He was my mother’s close friend’s son. He was one person that showed me so much love. He was always there for me; he was the first person to ever make me a special card. I had a huge crush on him. When sex was not coming to play in the relationship, he said he was tired and I was so heart-broken. I was supposed to go to University of Lagos; it was because of him I changed my admission to Obafemi Awolowo University. I saw him as an epitome of the kind of person I would like to spend the rest of my life with. That was the first major crush that I had.

My First Sexual Encounter
My first introduction to sex was rape. It was with one of our tenants. I got so close to him and saw him as an elder brother. He looked at me as someone that had been exposed because I was busty and he thought I had had a sexual experience before. So he had his way with me. Then it was not something you tell the whole world. People said we should keep quiet about it. Then they tried to make trouble with him but subsequently people said we should keep quiet about it. We had to try and manage it in our own way even though it affected me for a long time psychologically. I had to gradually get over it. I believed so much in the principle of keeping your virginity till you are married. I started showbiz from Teen TV on DBN with Chichi Okaro. Then I used to be so vocal and when we spoke about pre-marital sex and virginity, I was always so passionate about it. It was such a disadvantage and a pity for me.

My Experience As A Busty Lady
At the initial stage, I used to be so ashamed of myself. At that time, I would wear clothes that would not let my bust be noticeable. I was trying everything I could so that it would not be obvious. Subsequently, when I started acting and reading books, I read a book that said the best admirer you have is yourself and the way you carry yourself is how people would take you. I had to psyche myself to love it. After I did so, I noticed that I was getting advances even from people I didn’t expect, like some of my late father’s friends. Being a deep thinker, I always look at the advantage of everything, I saw that it was something I could not change so I had to make the best out of it. I got it into my sub-conscious that it was a plus than minus. I have had reasons to talk to a lot of people that are busty and who do not appreciate themselves. They now see it as an asset than a liability.

About My Love Life
No comment (I love that!)

Now she has given you a voice. See no reasons to cover these callous men who hurt women in the dark even if they be public figures thinking they can always get away with it. Come out of your hurt and speak out same way they have gone after your body and raped you without remorse.

No comments:

Post a Comment